how not to court a lady with the written word

how not to court a lady with the written word

write like a teenager without riddlin:

hi how r u wow u r super cute my name is ****** and i’ll like to know a little more about u thank u byeeeee

write like james joyce without the genius:

just curious where the seagull was or where you were with him or not so ensenuate you were with him but you know where was he located? its either someplace in italy or the northern california coast. I like elephants. I have one on my desk at work. His bumm is facing me as i was told thats good luck. iv’e never met one up close but they seem very sweet. I don’t think iv’e come across a woman who likes steinbeck and smash mouth football. can you play any softball? we have a weakness on the womens side of the field and not much better to speak of the men. i’m ******, I sell advertising for, and enjoy bass fishing. just kidding about the bass fishing but i do fish sometimes in between sales calls on the road. so now that the college and pro’s of football are on a break do you watch the arena league? the courthouse i’m doing jury duty at has one of the 8 or 9 L&O’s filming i was told. I dosed out on L&O, about three years ago while unemployed (ben bratt, and i were coat shopping once at barneys on a tues, afternoon, very tall guy) but swear to catch up when retired or debilhitated or both. i’m sort of a tomboy too. i can chnage my own bike tire and my oil in my car.

write like james joyce without the genius, part II

Hi my name is **** from Woodhaven queens just finished reading your profile very interesting you seem like a down to earth female with a great personality my interests include cooking, picnics, playing sports (baseball, basketball, football, handball) I currently work in telecom imma Transmissions Tech and im also a part time Musician I have no kids and no drama issues if you’d like to chat by all means you can reach me on aim *********

Be too far:

Hi beautiful girl how are you on this morning ?

– from El Caribe, Venezuela

Be too far, too old, too creepy:

Hello Sexy Face my name is Emilee.i was touched on move after view your profile and i decided to contact you privately.can you please tell me little about free minded man….i will like to share anything you want to know about me.promise not to hide anything from you.hope to hear from you very soon.Thanks

— emilee001, 66, Toledo, OH


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“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”


Upon common theatres, indeed, the applause of the audience is of more importance to the actors than their own approbation. But upon the stage of life, while conscience claps, let the world hiss! On the contrary if conscience disapproves, the loudest applauses of the world are of little value - john adams
March 2007
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from the man who taught me everything:

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”



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