Archive for the 'enlightenment philosophy' Category

what do you get when you cross a hedge fund trader and a longshoreman?

well, that depends on whom you ask, i guess.  but according to ronnie of carle place, long island, what you get is what i, apparently, need. 

cs lewis and i met at the beer garden for a drink after an especially painful stab therapy session.  as i’d suspected, cs lewis’d made friends by the time i arrived.  ronnie and ralphie, two mooks of the highest order (a sincere compliment in my book).  they were waiting for friends, too and had invited cs to sit with them whilst she waited for me.

i was in a foul mood.  work had been especially rough, i’d endured 6 hours, 2 cancelled flights and several delays at cleveland hopkins airport.  i’d had to meet corky st kurtz, the ‘creative’ head of my division in the president’s club and had a very awkward conversation.  you know when you know that someone just does not like you, especially for no good reason, but you have to have polite, civil, and hopefully productive conversations with them?  and then they condescend to you and tell you to remain there after they leave and have some drinks because they’re free?  did i mention that i’m pretty much the only person out of seventy plus in the division actually bringing in revenue? 

couple that with the painful therapy and the fact that i had to get up early the next morning for an mri, and i was so close to going home and burying my head in my pillow.  luckily, i kept my date with cs because these guys were hilarious. 

ralphie and ronnie were joined by mikey and val.  the former being a high school english teacher living in his parents long island basement with a prodigious early eighties porn collection and the latter being a french immigrant working in technology who thoroughly enjoyed all the racist slurs and gallic slander we could conjure up.  ronnie was married, waiting for his wife to get home from a girls night out so they could celebrate their first anniversary together.

i must tell you that a night out drinking with a quadrumvirate of ball-busting mooks is exactly what the doctor ordered.

they gave very helpful advice on men. mostly from ronnie, who told me i scare the shit out of the stronger sex and that’s why i’m single (yeah, ronnie, that’s what i tell myself).  other roundtable topics included favorite authors, the best lines from fight club, shaving/ hair preferences and personal styles, why, exactly, mikey still lived in the basement, the diamond trade and nifty blackberry tips.

i had intended on going home early so as to avoid being hungover for my MRI, but stayed out late because it was such a fun and relaxing evening. 

i also learned it’s possible to play wingman via text (good luck with frenchy, cs!).

we definitely have to hang out with those guys again.  and, yes, daphne, you’ll be there.


YES, I am totally one of those nerds (LOST theories)

I’m having yet another one of those HOLY SHIT moments about LOST, this one specifically relating to last night’s season finale.  So, if you’re not caught up, be warned, spoilers and ridiculous theories abound.

 1.  I think Jacob is in the coffin at the Haffs/ Drawlor* Funeral Home.  Jack would care because his life sucks after leaving the island, but Kate does not because her life has obviously improved. 

2.  Thanks to the bigger nerds out there, we know that the obit that so messes Jack up is for J…. antham of New York (for sure ruling out Sawyer) and the date of the obit is April 5, 2007.  How do we know this?  Because of the blessed geeks with HDTV out there who recognized the headline in the paper as belonging to an actual LA Times article:

april 5th story

obit closeup

Scratch that, I’m back to thinking it’s Locke- maybe as an amputee (that’s why the coffin seems small).  There’s no confirmation that Locke doesn’t have a last name that he doesn’t use.  After all, the real “Sawyer” wasn’t much of a father, and admitted he went by many names, so Locke might be the name of one of his foster parents.  But if it IS Locke, why didn’t Helen (Katy Segal) at least come?  You know what, it’s definitely Locke. 

Back to Jacob, we know that the creators have a serious thing for English philosophers, especially proponents of utlitarianism (which I totally studied my sophmore year in college and promptly forgot).  The icon of which is Jeremy Bentham.  Why can’t Jacob’s last name be Bentham?  He doesn’t have to be the Jacob on the Hanso board of directors- if he was, why would he allow Ben to kill all of his staff? 

Bentham’s biggest influences were John Locke, David (Desmond?) Hume, Jean-Jacques (Danielle?) Rousseau- see a pattern here?  All the people with whom the Island has an extra special connection.  Also, John (Kate) Austin-  a philosopher with ideas about moral and written law.

But the Bentham kicker is this thing called the Panopticon.  You gotta look this thing up.  I’m sure the similarities to the island and it’s different stations are no coincidence.

panopticon for dummies

or for those of you with even more free time than me:

panopticon for philosophy majors and/or masochists

Oh!  Also, since Patchy (Mikhail) seems to be immortal (surviving harpooning, brain aneurysm, etc.), as does Richard (mr. eyeliner), maybe they were born there OR came to the island aboard The Black Rock?  Richard was wearing pirate-y like clothes in Ben’s flashback to his youth and Mikhail’s got that eye patch.  Visual clues?  Normally, I don’t love all things pirate (in fact I now hate them, thank you Disney), but there IS a galleon on the island.

I know tomorrow I’ll have changed my mind again and found tons of new evidence to back up my new cockamamie theory, but I’m sticking with this for now.

Good thing we only have till February 09 to expound these theories.  As long as ABC and co. keep us going with the fake ads and websites and guerilla marketing…

we’ll all have forgotten about it until the DVD comes out.

* an anagram of Flash Forward

other goodies:

ben’s diary



“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”


Upon common theatres, indeed, the applause of the audience is of more importance to the actors than their own approbation. But upon the stage of life, while conscience claps, let the world hiss! On the contrary if conscience disapproves, the loudest applauses of the world are of little value - john adams
May 2018
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from the man who taught me everything:

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.”